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relationship building – Dennis Cummins https://www.denniscummins.com Wed, 20 Feb 2019 08:05:22 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 https://www.denniscummins.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/DrDennisfavicon-150x150.png relationship building – Dennis Cummins https://www.denniscummins.com 32 32 Cross Cultural Business Mentoring https://www.denniscummins.com/cross-cultural-business-mentoring/ Wed, 18 Jul 2012 12:00:43 +0000 https://www.denniscummins.com/?p=1496 mentoringIt’s almost a given that, in today’s fast paced global business climate, you’re going to have to develop relationships across a wide range of cultures. That also means that some of us will have to step into the role of a mentor to someone from another place during our careers. This can be challenging, in some cultures the presence of a mentor in any way, can be perceived as an insult. In many areas the relationship between mentor and the mentee will be far more challenging than in a standard Western business environment.

Here are some tips to help you face these situations better prepared:

Develop Some Personal Cultural Awareness

That means taking some time out to examine your own culture. What values do you hold that might present a challenge in the relationship? It might be that you come from a culture in which “sharing” of feelings and feedback is the norm. Alternatively it might be that you’re not comfortable with “one-on-one” learning formats. What aspects of you as a mentor do you think might be misunderstood by someone from a different culture?

Try to Understand Your Mentee’s Culture

Spend a little time learning about their country and culture. Find out more about the people, their business environment, dominant religious culture (or lack of the same), familial ties, education, etc. The more you know – the better prepared you will be.

Think About Your Communication Patterns

It’s important to focus on communicating in a non-threatening way to build understanding. You’ll want to pay attention to language – don’t forget that idiom and specific local examples don’t always translate well, even for the most experience ESL speaker. Try and spend some time focusing on more universal examples, and don’t be afraid to elaborate when describing a situation. Rephrase content and use open-ended questions to gauge understanding. If you’re worried that there may be a cultural misunderstanding – don’t be afraid to address that directly in discussion.

Spend a Little More Time Understanding Your Mentee’s Culture

There are many places on earth where people don’t express themselves verbally. In “face” cultures for example, people are generally loathe to criticize behaviour or express negative feelings. You want to try and avoid personal or probing questions and watch out for non-verbal cues. Of course it can be difficult for a remote mentor to catch these on a telephone call, so it’s important to try and get some face time in to a mentoring relationship even if it’s only over Skype.

Try and avoid direct “Yes/No” response questions when you’re checking the understanding of your mentee. This can leave them feeling trapped and unable to supply any answer except the one you want to hear. Try and avoid direct criticism too – it’s much better to enable the mentee to address their own concerns, rather than force a viewpoint on them.

Mentoring across cultures is an amazing experience. It gives you the chance to learn a lot about another culture. Successful relationships are all about common ground and understanding, hopefully these tips will give you a head start in achieving just that.

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The Power of Communication https://www.denniscummins.com/how-to-communicate-like-a-pro/ Sat, 18 Dec 2010 14:29:13 +0000 https://www.denniscummins.com/?p=326 How To Communicate Like A ProWhile penning a note Mark Twain once said, “I would have made this note smaller, but I didn’t have enough time.” Notice the humor? He knew that to convey a message with fewer words, it actually takes more time. What’s your communication style? Do you express yourself with many words (like the U.S. Constitution), or few words (like the Gettysburg address)? Is most of your communication over cell phone or by email? Sometimes the very act of making a cell phone call can be a trick bag full of communication difficulties. Heaven forbid the caller is getting in an elevator. I like to think that communicating effectively is simple, but not easy. It’s simple to rattle off an email or say what’s on our mind in a manner that only we may understand, but not easy to communicate our points succinctly and clearly so that readers and listeners understand what we’re saying, especially, given the vast array of different communication mediums used in business today.

Are communication skills important in business? It’s a silly question to be sure; however, just how important is communicating effectively? Could it be the most important variable? The answer may surprise you. According to the National Association of Colleges and Employers, recruiters are taking a different look when choosing from the hoards of uniquely qualified job applicants. Of course, students with high GPAs who matriculate from prestigious colleges are attractive candidates; however, more and more, applicants with developed communication skills are considered the most hirable, regardless of their alma mater.

Generations ago, one would sit and carefully craft letters longhand by the glow of a candle. Now, we communicate with cell phones. Our conversations are continually interrupted by static and dropped calls. Since I (apparently) speak too loudly (just ask my wife), I often find myself speaking more softly on the cell phone, so I didn’t bother anyone Who knows if the other party can even hear me? It’s not just verbal communication; written communication is more challenging these days. We routinely send a quick email without much thought. Do you ever hit the send button too quickly? Do you ever use that fancy feature in Microsoft Outlook where you try to retrieve a sent email? Been there and done that!

With all the different ways to communicate it might be said that communicating effectively has become harder, not easier. It’s a challenge, but a skill necessary to master. Improved communication skills will help you cross the finish line with your customers! The results: happy customers who want to do business with you.

Here are some tips for better communication:

  • Understand the difference between correspondence and communication – treat them differently.

Too often, we treat correspondence like communication. For example, a buddy recently received a Happy Thanksgiving email – how impersonal! How does the expression go again — it’s the thought that counts? Obviously, the sentiment is from the right place, but could be more effectively echoed with a phone call or a greeting card. The sender probably sent the same email to his entire address book. Savvy people (and not so savvy people) can see through that. At the very least, send each email individually.

Correspondence has become an over-used crutch in business today. Everything is email. Triumphantly, each day, we shoot off email after email and act like we are accomplishing something. My colleague, Mike, suggests that the power of the written word is the most effective tool. A born connecter, he eschews email introductions, opting instead for a brief conversation to introduce people to each other. Start communicating with your contacts and customers. Don’t be a “desk jockey.” Get out there and break bread with face-to-face meetings.

  • It doesn’t always have to be about you – be interested in others.

Just before I sold my business, a salesman sent me a short email saying that one of our stores looked great and was busy with heavy Super Bowl traffic. His thoughts were brief and I was happy to receive them. Did he have to send a card or make a call to say that? No, that wasn’t necessary. It was best to send an email. He shared positive news out of the blue. It was nicely done. I love when people include a little “smiley” face in their emails. A neighbor of ours owns a large manufacturing company. He finishes every Friday afternoon email off with a smiley face icon. I’ve said this many times but it bears repeating. Email is so impersonal. This smart executive is adding a little life to his communication. It goes a long way.

Effective communicators spend less time with paperwork and more time listening to their customers and associates. Cheer for others. Be interested in their success. Applaud their achievements. As Jeffrey Gitomer (2006) said in The Little Black Book of Connections,”The question you have to ask yourself is: How can I make people better as a result of connecting (or knowing) me?”

  • Talk to hear yourself talk – listen to your written words to see how they sound.

Always read your emails and memos out loud. Try it! Your words will actually have a different ring to them. The benefit is that by doing this, you will more closely simulate what your readers will hear or see. Typically, when I take this step, I find things I want to change. Read between the lines. Will your meaning come across the right way? If you’re unsure, revise and experience the thrill of discovering a better way to get your point across.

Remove useless phrases and clichés. Avoid superlatives. Our readers know that we think our products and services are “extraordinary!” and “super-special!” Avoid this unnecessary noise. Your writing will be clearer and more persuasive.

  • Say it right the first time – prepare to create a meaningful first impression.

We all know the significance of making a great first impression, but it’s actually more important and carries a lot more weight than most think. Turns out, we typically make a decision about someone right away and then conform our thinking to fit the decision we’ve made. People typically make snap judgements and those sentiments end up sticking.

How you dress also communicates. Dress appropriately for meetings. I remember once a young sales guy came to a meeting dressed in a sport coat, jeans and a ratty old t-shirt. I’m sure he looked good on Friday night out with his buddies, but he wasn’t dressed appropriately for a business meeting. It would have been fine had he worn a simple button down shirt and khakis, a sign of respect for himself and for those with whom he wanted to communicate. Later, I asked someone and learned that his opinion was “If my prospects don’t want to do business with me because of the way I dress, so be it.” Wow, what a destructive communicative style.

Perhaps he didn’t realize that we routinely communicate through our clothing and appearance. I believe what he really was saying was, “I don’t care about you. I don’t care if I show up for this meeting like I’m at a modeling shoot. I’m going to do what’s best for ME.” As I’ve expressed repeatedly, make your customers feel important. Make them feel comfortable. Do what’s best for them, not you.

  • Speak in layman’s terms – keep informal communication short and simple.

Don’t overwhelm readers or listeners when giving a short sales pitch. According to infomercial fitness guru Tony Little (as quoted in Investor’s Business Daily), “The worst thing to do in a short sales meeting is to get technical. Even though a particular product may have 50 sales points, the best strategy is to pick a few important points and keep repeating them.” Readers and listeners only have so much attention span. Pick a few keys and try to hammer those points home.

  • Don’t phone it in – develop and use good phone etiquette.

Avoid using your cell phone in front of your clients and customers. The truth is that nobody wants to hear you on the phone. Typically, because cell phone users shout as if they are at a rock concert, their personal business is shared with everyone. I’m sure everyone has a horrific cell phone story. Here is mine. A few years ago, I took my wife out to lunch and sat next to a man and woman seemingly enjoying lunch together. Suddenly, one of their cell phones rang and they proceeded to conduct a 15 minute conversation on speaker phone.

We heard the whole conversation and it was bizarre, to say the least. Usually, we only hear one side of the conversation. This time we heard both sides. All we could do was laugh as they were oblivious to their surroundings. If I knew what YouTube was at the time, I would have filmed the whole episode.

  • Short is better – this isn’t the NBA!

Say what you want to say with fewer words. Brevity is the way to go. Remember that the Gettysburg address, still considered one of the greatest speeches of all time, was a scant 276 words. Try to cut down the size of your communications. Find ways to get your point across with fewer words. Reduce a 2 page memo to a single page. Highlight the important points while removing the tedious, unnecessary points.

Your readers are busy, just like you. Don’t waste time giving unnecessary details. Get to the point as quickly as possible. The same is true when speaking. Most experts believe that your conversation partner won’t remember much anyway, so be sure to cut through the clutter so the chances are better that your key points will resonate.

  • Don’t enter any vocabulary contests – use words that fit.

Have you ever had a conversation with someone who makes up words or uses big words to impress others? Many years ago I was speaking with a consultant together with my former wine director, Todd. The consultant said a word that was just a little too big for his tongue. He mentioned the “criticality” of a certain financial statistic. Todd and I shot each other a knowing look. This was a big word in our world, but the funny thing was we detected a slight smile on his face. It was almost as if he had been trying to get the word into the conversation.

According to Leil Lowndes (1999) in Talking the Winners Way, winning communicators use “rich, full words, but they never sound inappropriate.” This makes perfect sense. Don’t try to impress others with your vocabulary. Chances are you may use the word incorrectly or miss-pronounce it. The results may be egg all over your face. Play it safe and your conversations will go according to plan.

  • Listen, while you work – become a better listener.

Improve your listening skills. Become an active listener. Look into their eyes. Give the visual feedback they need to feel they are being heard. As I’ve mentioned before, my experience has taught me that, often times, others just want to be heard, and not necessarily for you to change your mind about something.

Put your cell phone (or blackberry) away and concentrate on your conversation partner. I was speaking with a supplier contact the other day. He related the story of one of his sales people typing an email message while conversing with a customer. His view (and I concur wholeheartedly): When you are speaking with someone, they must be treated like the most important person in the world at that precise moment. Yes, there are some exceptions. I always mention if I am expecting a call or email, but only if it is truly urgent. Otherwise, keep your attention focused on your conversation partner.

Here is the rub and I’ll try to say it as clearly as possible. Try to implement one of these tips each week and concentrate solely on that aspect of your communication style. Don’t do it all at once. The mind can’t focus on all these skills at once. The key is learned behaviors and skills that become second nature.

Only you can decide to become a better communicator. Reminds me of something I read recently. The 1972 Olympic Games took place in Munich, Germany. Frank Shorter was on the U.S. marathon team and won the race in one of the most thrilling races in Olympic history. As he circled the track with just a short distance to go, Jim McKay summarized the achievement by saying, “You have to run the race yourself!” His comment suggested that, at the end of the day, it was up to the marathoner to summon the courage, guts and stamina to compete (and win) and that nobody would do it for him.

The same is true with your communication skills. Make others feel important. Choose the right method of communication. Keep things brief and simple. Read your words – will your intended meaning show through? Thank people memorably. Go that extra mile. Show initiative and effort. Others will want to be around you. The result: you will cross the finish line with your associates, clients and customers.

Article Source: EzineArticles.com

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Customer Relationship Building Strategy #2: ” I Hear You” https://www.denniscummins.com/customer-relationship-building-strategy-2-i-hear-you/ https://www.denniscummins.com/customer-relationship-building-strategy-2-i-hear-you/#comments Tue, 30 Mar 2010 22:47:23 +0000 https://www.denniscummins.com/?p=122 Once you listen to your customers’ needs, you have to let them know that you can help them. It is important to make them realize that you understand their problem by letting them know that you heard them.

customer

Sometimes that’s as simple as just repeating what you heard them say. “If I understand correctly, these are your needs” and summarizing what you heard. Then after you clarify what you heard, a great strategy to use is to ask, “Is that correct?” They will tell you whether or not you’ve summarized it correctly and then you can ask, “Is there anything else?” This will help you discover if they have any additional problems or concerns. This is an opportunity to re-listen; to reiterate what you heard them say. What may be holding them back? What do they perceive as drawbacks? What are the things that could stop them? What are their obstacles? What is their budget? What is their desired outcome? All of these things are very important for businesses to know, but often businesses are more focused on their own business rather than the needs of the people that they are designed to serve.

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